Showing posts with label tantrums. Show all posts
Showing posts with label tantrums. Show all posts

Monday, May 17, 2010

Supernanny, wherefore art thou?

Oh, Jo-whatever-your-last-name is. Yes, you with the purple skirt-suit you wear in every episode of your show. You know, this one:


I could really use you in my house right about now. You and your British-ness are needed badly. You see, it turns out that I do not actually have a preschooler. No. She is actually a moody 17-year-old merely trapped in the BODY of a preschooler. That is the only way I can explain the talking back (I think ol' Jo refers to this as "backchat), the defiance, and the incessant need to have the last word. (Hmm, come to think of it, maybe she's a member of the U.S. Senate disguised as a preschooler).
Things have gone from bad to worse on the tantrum/defiance front, and it is not fun, my friends. Not fun at all. Now, the lucky thing for me is that we do not engage in public tantrums. So, most of the activity in question is relegated to our warm, happy home. But really. It is BAD. Take yesterday, for example. We decided to take a nice family stroll around the lake. Ava said she wanted to take her scooter, and promised she would not get tired. Why I believed this, I will never know. So, we loaded up the SINGLE jogging stroller and drove on our way. I think we made it about oh, 3/4 mile before her little legs began to get tired. At this point, I should mention that the husband really thought we should bring the double jogger, but I insisted that it was too bulky and didn't want to have to remove stuff from my car (which also prompted me to start whining about needing a bigger car). He was nice and just loaded up the single. Okay, so the whining begins 3/4 mile in. And guess how long the trail is? Yes, that's right. Two-and-a-quarter miles. So, we trekked on, with the promise that we would stop to feed the ducks. so, we did. At this point, the whining/crying was escalating in volume, and the skies were darkening with an approaching storm. It was time to hightail it outta there. The solution was great for Ava, bad for the rest of us. We took Davis out of the stroller, put her in it, along with her scooter and helmet, and I CARRIED Davis for the remaining mile. Have I mentioned that he's 23 lbs? Yeah, that was a lot of work. Not so much fun. But we made it before the storm.

Now, Sunday night is Family Dinner night. (Yes, I know that all nights SHOULD be, but we do not live in a perfect world). Post-lake walk, I made some shrimp fajitas (thanks to Gina for this recipe ). It only took Ava about 5 minutes to finish her 2 bites of dinner, and she very politely (seriously) asked to be excused. Well, kids, we all love polite, but it still doesn't always get you what you want. We told her we'd like for her to stay at the table with us while we finished. That did it. She went on to cry, yell, whine, complain, kvetch, etc. about how badly she did not want to sit there, how bored she was, etc. We didn't give in. We just ignored and talked to each other. But the damage was done, and there was no amending the night. Her antics got her no reading time, and as soon as I cleaned up the kitchen, I sent her to bed. She was asleep before 7pm.

Now, here's the other thing that's going on (and seriously, if there are any of you reading this that would like to offer up advice, I welcome opinions and comments). She is back to having infant-like separation anxiety. I mean, I can't even go out for a run without her bursting into tears. It's bad. And again, this is something that only goes on at home. She happily goes to school, to dance, to friends' houses. It's like she just can't fathom the idea of being at our house without me. And she's also waking up at night saying she's scared and wanting me to sleep in her bed. I'm exhausted today from last night's bout of musical beds. I started out in mine, and then she came in my room around 1:30am saying, "Mommy, I had a really, really, really, really, really scary dream." I said I'd lie down with her for 2 minutes but then was going back to my room. Well, as soon as I started to leave, she freaked. So, back into her bed I went, where I dozed off. Woke up a bit later and went back to my own room. She was back to get me an hour or so later. And then again at 6am, when she was begging to get into my bed. I mean, the EASY solution is for me to just sleep in her room. But that's not what I want to do, and she needs to know that her Daddy and I sleep in the same bed and that's that.

Argh. We're actually going to talk with her ped on Thursday about all this. Did I mention that she pushed over a table a few weeks ago? Oh yeah. Total Real Housewives of New Jersey-style.

To ease my strife, I bought a pretty new Lilly Pulitzer dress this morning.


Made me feel better. :-) Especially since I got to be the person in the dressing room who said, "Actually, can I try this in a 2? The 4 is a little big." Mad love to the clothing manufacturers who cater to our egos and skew their sizing.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Perhaps I SHOULD be this tired....

Wow. I never truly realized how active boys are! When A turned one, we gave her one of those Pottery Barn Kids anywhere chairs. She loved it. She would climb in and chill with a little Baby Einstein so Mommy could make dinner. She sometimes even sat and played with a single toy for a full five minutes. D, on the other hand, has NO interest in TV. I know, I know. There will come a day when I have to tell him, "no, you may not watch another show," but for now, I would love to get him to sit quietly for just a few minutes. That boy is on the go all the time. No wonder he's so exhausted by 6:30 every night!


Since A no longer naps, she will occassionally get a little tired at the end of the day. Here they both are, following A's ballet class a couple of weeks ago:

Normally, I am not so fond of letting my  4-year-old sleep during the day, but sometimes, the peace and quiet that is the result of 2 sleeping children is just too much to resist. As all moms know, the craziest time of day begins around 5pm, so to have just a few moments of zen before that starts is like a little slice of heaven.
Somthing funny to mention before I sign off: My sweet daughter is, shall we say, mildly tantrum-prone? Okay, midly  may be putting it quite lightly. Let's just say that maybe she never fully outgrew her colic. The girl has a temper, and (yeah, I'll admit it), she might be just a wee bit spoiled. Anyway. Tantrums seem to come in waves, and last week was a week o' meltdowns. Funny things come out of her mouth during these moments, though. Some highlights from last week include, "I'm not having a tantrum! I'm MISERABLE!!" Also worthy of mention was (when her daddy was trying to reason with her), "I really just need to have little talk with Mommy. That will make me feel much more better!" I think at one point she also mentioned that she would not live at our house anymore.
I'm learning a lot about patience and my own temper (me??) in all of this. Remaining calm truly is helpful to all. And, we're really having to work on this whole spoiled first child thing. I swear, A should be planning to go to law school. The girl is super-persuasive, and it's hard to say no. We're getting there, though. It's a slow process.
So, between a 1-year-old boy who only stops when he sleeps, and a 4 1/2 year old drama queen, this Mommy is pretty wiped out by the end of most days. Oh, and did I mention that I've taken up running and a boot camp exercise class? Riiigght. Busy & tired. But good. Very good.
A
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