Oh, the Places She'll Go

First day of school poses

Well, summer officially came to an end today when I took Ava to her first day of Kindergarten. If you live in Wake County, you probably know that the public schools do something called "staggered entry." Basically, they just bring about a quarter of the students in each day for assessment. Ava's staggered day is today, and then her first "real" day with her teacher and classroom is on Thursday. But, today is a full day, so it felt pretty real.

I spent my summer feeling ready for her to go off to school. After all, she's six years old, and did a half day kindergarten last year. I was like, "Yeah, we've got this. No big deal at all." In my mind, I scoffed at parents who were so sad to be sending their babies off to school.

So, off we went this morning. I was organized. Lunch was packed last night. The backpack was ready. Requested paperwork was filled out. Ava was asleep at a decent hour. I even did a cycle class at 6am, took a shower, dried my hair, and put on makeup. And a new dress. (Back to school clothes aren't just for kids, you know). Ava had picked out her outfits for the whole week back in July, so we were good.

We arrived on time, and just for today, we were asked to walk the kids in. Ava had expressed a teensy (ok, lots) of anxiety before we left, but as soon as we walked into her school, she was giddy. She was skipping down the hall, thrilled to see her new home away from home. The problem came when we got to the classroom, and there was about a 7 minute wait to get her checked in. That's when the big anxiety set in. I expected that, though. She's always been a high-stress kid, and I didn't think today would be the day she would deviate from her own ways. She was clingy, but after a gentle nudge, she went into the classroom.There were some tears, but I know that's how she is, I urged her on.

I was fine.

Until I turned around and started to leave.

That's when I felt the tightness in my throat. The tears in my eyes. What? This was not what I had expected from myself. I managed to keep it together, but to be honest, I think if I had allowed it, I could have bawled my eyes out.

Luckily for me, a good friend had invited Davis and me to come over, and she had a celebratory mimosa waiting for me when I got there. Best surprise of my day.

I have about another hour until I go pick Ava up. I won't lie - Davis is napping and I'm enjoying a very quiet house. I can't wait to hear about Ava's day, though.

To all of you whose emotional states I may have mocked when your kids went off to school, my sincere apologies. It turns out you were right.

xoxo,
Carter